Category: Mercy

A Time of Rest

Posted on by Paula

“I started sorting things out with God and getting serious about some of the things He’d been putting on my heart over the past several years. Most of those things boil down to taking care of myself. The problem is, I have always tried to cram way more things into my day than I have time for. So, taking care of myself wasn’t the priority. However, if the Holy Spirit dwells in my body and I am to offer my body as a living sacrifice, I need to take care of it.” I wrote those words in my very first blog post, “A Season of Gray Hairs and Discipline.”

Beginning January 1 this year, I had made it a priority to take care of myself and find balance. I was tired of my mess and was ready to get serious about the things that God had been convicting me about for far too long. I’d been doing really well with my endeavor, but at the 6 month point my balance was a little off again, and I wasn’t sure how to fix it. A few things in life changed (as they always do) and my routine needed to adapt to these changes as well. However, I was so caught up in “staying afloat” that I couldn’t find time to figure out a solution.

Luckily, we were scheduled to leave for vacation at the end of June, but things got worse the week before with all the preparations that needed taken care of.  In order to take my break, I had to not only keep up with my day-to-day responsibilities, but also work ahead to take care of bills and such that would need my attention before we returned. I got up early each morning to take care of a few things, used my lunch break for errands and laundry and then came home from the office to take care of more responsibilities, finally going to bed late.

I had been looking forward to hiding away, resting and letting God unclutter my mind and untangle my heart. Every year, my family plans an escape where we can shut everything out for a week. I was so ready to for a reset and could hardly wait to reach our destination and sort things out with God.

Our drive should have taken about 14 hours but took over 18 due to traffic. I slept almost the entire drive and also slept through the night. I was even more tired than I thought.

I had a lovely, relaxing week away. I enjoyed early morning walks/runs with my girls followed by coffee and Bible study under the coconut trees with God. I listened to the tide rolling in and out and the birds singing in the trees. I basked in the warm sun and gentle ocean breeze. I walked along the shore, searched for seashells and delighted in the hot sand under my feet. I was entertained by the little crabs that scurried about and by the manatee that I followed for about a mile before it disappeared.

Sometimes I’d think, sometimes I’d pray and sometimes I’d let the roar of the ocean drown everything out. No worries. No problem solving. Simply enjoying the peace and resting.

Because of God’s perfect timing, I found myself in the book of Judges on vacation. God’s people seemed to be caught in a vicious cycle. They would follow God and receive his blessing, but then they would stray. They’d forget the great things God had done, but God wouldn’t forget his covenant with them. Because he loved them, he would discipline them so they would return to him and obey.

So, there I was at a point in my life when I had “forgotten” my strong commitment to get serious and obey what God had been putting on my heart for so long. I was still seeking God each day, but at the same time, I was neglecting to fix the things that were throwing me off the track he had put me on. When we start to veer just a little bit, we are in a dangerous place because if we continue to veer, we will be pulled farther and farther from where God wants us to be. Thankfully, God was waiting with his love, mercy and grace, ready to help me get back on track. I just needed to stop and get away from the noise a while so that I could see the root of the problem and nip it in the bud.

During my break, God pointed out to me a few different things that I needed to address. As funny as it may seem, I realized once again that my biggest problem was not getting enough rest. It seems that when I have a lot I want to accomplish, I should tackle the list and conquer as much as possible each day to get things done. However, not getting enough rest was really throwing my life out of balance, and unfortunately the things that were getting pushed aside were the most important.

As we were driving home, a Third Day song started playing,

“How many times have I turned away?

The number is the same as the sand on the shore

But every time You’ve taken me back

And now, I pray You do it once more

Please, take from me my life

When I don’t have the strength

To give it away to You

Please, take from me my life

When I don’t have the strength

To give it away to You, Jesus.”

 My turning away has gotten less and less over the years, but I want to be at the point where I never turn away. I want to be 100% obedient. Not my will but his will.

So here I am, back to reality. The pace must pick up again, and I will be pulled in several directions. The messages about problems that need dealt with are waiting. The refrigerator is empty. The bills and laundry are accumulating again. But, I am refreshed. My focus is where it needs to be. I am at peace. God is faithful, and is ready to woo me back if I start to get off track.

“Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness” (Lamentations 3:22-23). Amen!

Thank You God, for Mercy, Peace and Drano

Posted on by Paula

I don’t understand how it happened. It was one of those “Mondays” disguised as a Tuesday. I was in the middle of my typical morning rush to get ready for work when all of a sudden, I saw black smoke rising in front of me. Instead of putting my eyeshadow compact back into my makeup basket, I had somehow dropped it into the 3-wick candle that was burning behind it. All I could think was that I needed to quickly put the decent sized flame out as fast as possible. In my moment of panic, I tipped the candle upside down so that the compact would fall into the sink. I wasn’t even thinking about all the melted wax until I realized it was spilling into the sink…and down the drain as the compact fell! How could I have done that?! I frantically wiped what I could out of the sink and then ran to the other room to grab a bottle of Drano. I poured the drain opener into the sink and waited for over 20 minutes, but it did not go down the drain. I boiled hot water and poured it into the sink as well. Steam rose into the air, but so did the liquid in the sink. I finally had to say a prayer, draw a line to mark the level in the sink, shut the bathroom door and ask my daughter to check on it later to see if the level of Drano and water was falling. I left for work thinking that this would be the last straw; my husband would surely kill me over this one. My daughter later texted me that the sink had finally drained, and I truly meant my reply of “Praise the Lord!!!” I still had some wax in the sink to wipe out when I got home, but the sink was functioning properly. What a relief!

Yesterday morning, I was rushing to leave for church and got there just as worship was starting. I started singing along, “Then sings my soul, my Savior God to thee. How great thou art. How great thou art.” Then, the worship team led me into one of my favorites, “God, I run into your arms, unashamed because of mercy. I’m overwhelmed, I’m overwhelmed by You…. You are Beautiful… You are Wonderful… You are Glorious… Oh God, there is no one more Beautiful…” The words of every song that morning spoke truth into my soul, and tears trickled down my face as I sang along.

I hadn’t realized all the trivial things that had caused me stress and annoyance over the past week or so. I had been caught in a rush with too much to do. I was trying to organize 2 major events that involved coordinating multiple families with too many busy schedules as well trying to tie up several loose ends both in the office and at home so I could take a break over the upcoming holiday. I had been praying and thinking over the weekend before about a difficult decision I needed to make. Monday morning, I burned my arm really bad on a hot iron. (It’s still oozing!) A couple of hours later, I had to finalize my decision I’d been praying about, and though I had finally reached peace in it all, it was a very difficult decision nonetheless. That evening, I found out that someone very dear to my heart was undergoing testing for some serious health issues. Tuesday was the “flaming eye shadow/wax down the drain” incident. (That’s quite enough stress for one day!) Wednesday, I battled a wasp nest in my doorway (Ok. The wasp issue really wasn’t that dreadful, but let’s throw it in.) That was also the day that my temporary crown fell out which meant that Thursday, I had to take time out to go back to the dentist for another temporary crown. I was thankful that the dentist squeezed me in, but “ain’t nobody got time for that” when their to do list is already way too long. Friday, I found out that the test results for the sweet young lady I’d been praying for weren’t what we had hoped. It was also a day of arguments caused by misunderstandings and exhausted people and a tense schedule.

Now, none of those things were really that bad. However, when a woman is intent on staying on task, running at a very fast pace, cramming too much in and shrugging off the physical rest that the Good Lord is calling her to, she may not even realize what’s happening inside. I knew I needed more time in prayer that week. I knew I needed more time in God’s word. I knew I needed more rest. Yet, I stayed in turbo mode whispering those little “breath prayers,” reading a minimal amount of Scripture and getting by on little sleep. So, by Sunday, my soul was desperately longing for rest and the peace that can only come through Jesus.

My heart resonated with the words on the screen during worship. God is so great! He is so beautiful, wonderful and glorious! I ran into His arms, unashamed because of mercy, and I was overwhelmed by Him. I thought about the past week and a half. I had known that something wasn’t right, but I kept chugging along. Meanwhile, there were burdens on my heart that I hadn’t even realized were there. My soul was longing for time at His feet, but I kept ignoring my need and running around, a woman on a mission. However, it was the wrong mission. I drowned out the longing more and more while the busyness of life stole more and more of my peace with God. Shifting my focus back solely on how great God is changed everything, and peace washed through my entire being just like the Drano and hot water washing through the stopped-up drain.

I know that I can’t let the busyness of life get in the way, but that is exactly what occurred. And again, “I don’t understand how it happened.” I am thankful though, for a God I can run to, unashamed because of his mercy, his grace and his love. I am thankful for the Holy Spirit who guides me back where I need to be. I am thankful for the peace that washes over me because of the blood of Jesus. And I am thankful that Drano and hot water cut through the solidified wax in my drain….

“As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, ‘Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!’

‘Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.’” ~Luke 10:38-42 NIV

Determined to continue choosing what is better. Thankful for mercy when I fall.