I was having a productive day and staying on task. As I was rushing, my foot hit a hole, twisted and caused me to lose my balance. Pain shot through the top of my foot. How could this happen? I had a lot to do, and I had also just gotten back into the swing of walking & dabbling with running after being in a bit of a slump. I was angry. My mind raced with thoughts that included all the reasons why an injured foot was NOT acceptable at this time.
Suddenly, the pain was gone. I truly believed that God had healed me. I thanked him excitedly and got back to business. I unloaded the groceries, shopped for a gift, mailed a package, stopped by Homewood for gift certificates (caved in for the coconut yogurt & mango Dole Whip while I was there!), delivered a thank you card, stopped by the insurance company, ran to the bank, dropped a load off at Silk Purse and went to help my niece with a favor. I was doing just fine! However, after going up & down my niece’s stairs, my foot hurt—just a little bit. I shrugged it off and drove back to town. As I walked a few blocks to finish the last errand, I felt like I might be limping. How embarrassing! I hoped no one would think that I was one of those ladies who can’t walk in high heels.
By the time I got home, the pain had definitely returned. I had a big knot on the top of my foot and pain going up my leg. Because I had broken the same foot before and had ended up with a blood clot at that time, I thought I should get it checked out.
The doctor suspected a broken foot and ordered an x-ray. By the time I went back for that, I was unable to put my foot on the floor to walk. Reluctantly, I agreed to being pushed in a wheelchair. Sigh…
The doctor came in with the results. She was surprised that the foot wasn’t broken in the swollen area but asked if my big toe hurt. The x-ray showed it was broken.
I was confused, because my big toe was fine, but after thinking a while, I remembered it hurting really bad back in February when I dropped a heavy stool on it. I thought back then that it might be broken, but I didn’t figure anything could be done with a broken toe. I rested my toe that day and the next, but made myself get back on the treadmill the following. I had been faithfully walking six days a week for over a month at that time, and I was not going to let this get into my way. I pushed myself to walk in pain but could only manage to walk about 20 minutes. The next day was my normal Sunday day of rest. Monday, I pushed myself for 30 minutes. Each day, I could walk longer with less pain until there was no pain or limitation on how long I could last.
So, yeah, I guess I did break that toe back in February, but it seemed fine now. The doctor said I didn’t need to do anything since it no longer hurt but added that I might have arthritis in it someday.
As for the new injury, the doctor told me that it was probably a sprain that could last a few days to a couple of months. I left on crutches, thinking of all the reasons why this absolutely could not last for a couple of months and continuing to beat myself up for stepping in the hole. I went home that Friday night determined that I would be better by Monday and running by Friday even though I couldn’t put any weight on the foot at all. The next morning, I could put a little weight on my heel. I ran errands on crutches and rested my foot in the afternoon and all day the next day. By Sunday evening, I could hobble. By Monday, I was able to take a 50 minute morning walk and another walk that evening. By Friday, I ran!
I am so thankful that I can walk and run just a week after the injury and I am glad that I went to see what the problem was. However, I wouldn’t have known my toe had actually been broken back in February if I hadn’t gone in June for the injured foot.
This whole scenario made me think about old wounds we can have deep down. Feelings of resentment, unforgiveness, guilt, bitterness, anger and hopelessness if not dealt with can be buried and hidden away in denial. Everything might look fine on the outside, but on the inside we know that we have broken fellowship with God or someone who was once close to us. Another incident can pop up that needs attention, and during that time of examining the new incident, the old hurt is exposed and brought to our attention.
When we don’t deal with our hurts but choose instead to ignore the pain, our relationship with God or someone here on earth can become damaged. Sometimes, when that old hurt is brought to the surface again, we are able to properly deal with it and find complete healing. Other times, we have waited too long and must learn to live with whatever consequences result. The important thing is that we eventually come to terms with that hurt.
Maybe someone has hurt you, but you haven’t forgiven them. Jesus said, “If you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins” (Matthew 6:14-15). If you’re having trouble forgiving someone, ask God to help you forgive.
Maybe you are the person who needs to ask forgiveness. If pride has been getting in your way of asking forgiveness, humble yourself and apologize.
Some relationships will heal quickly, some may take time and others might not mend at all if the other person chooses not to accept your apology. However, no matter how the other person responds, you can have peace in knowing that you did your part to make things right again; unforgiveness on the other person’s part is sometimes a consequence that you must live with. However, when it comes to God, He is always ready to forgive. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).
So when an injury takes place, the best thing to do is address it and take the necessary measures for healing as soon as possible. If by chance you do examine yourself and find that you have hurts that you’ve been ignoring and trying to bury deep where they can’t be seen, give them to God. Remember that God’s forgiveness and grace are always available. You just need to ask. He will also enable you to forgive those with whom you’ve been holding a grudge. Let your hurts come to the surface and find peace through God.