My friend, Shelly, texted me, “Are you up to going to the concert?” She had invited me to attend as her guest several weeks before. I love Casting Crowns and had been to 2 or 3 of their concerts, but I wasn’t sure if I still wanted to go. I hadn’t been feeling well physically, my mind was on overload and my heart was burdened over other people’s suffering. I was overwhelmed because of being really busy both at work and home. I was really longing for a day to just stay at home and go nowhere.
To make matters worse, I felt bad for snapping at my family that afternoon. My husband simply asked me what I thought we’d have for dinner that night, but because I was so worn down from too much working and not enough resting (still no excuse), I snapped. I started listing off all of the things that I needed to take care of, how I couldn’t do it all and how exhausted I was…again. I felt terrible. He & my family didn’t deserve the angry rant that proceeded out of my mouth.
So, no. I really didn’t feel like going to worship with my friend. On top of wanting to stay at home and rest, I figured I’d see a lot of people I knew from our church and community. I didn’t want anyone to see me in the mood I was in, and I wasn’t sure if I could “put on the face” to hide how I felt inside. Yet deep down, I knew I needed to go. So, I went.
We entered the doors to the building and before we even reached the auditorium, I talked to or waved back to at least a dozen people I knew. Inside the auditorium, I passed another dozen on the way to my seat. They were in front of me, behind me and down my row. I tried not to think of them. I tried not to wonder if they could see through me. I sat still for the first time in a long time and tried to hold it together while longing for God to reach down and fix my attitude and brokenness.
The concert soon began. Through the words that were sung, I was reminded of God’s truth, love, faithfulness and awesomeness. Shifting my focus from myself to God, I was drawn into worship. It was me and God in a crowded room.
Although the Casting Crowns concert was a wonderful experience, the opening band, “I Am They,” was even more uplifting to me. I listened as they each shared their testimony. The band talked about their pasts with broken homes, divorces, drug addictions and pornography and how their lives were changed when they encountered Christ. They each had their struggle, yet God delivered them all, and there they stood on the stage right in front of me.
As a pastoral care associate and high school youth leader, I had walked in that night carrying a burden for lives that shared similar struggles. I had been listening to, loving on and praying for so many people caught in vicious cycles of struggle, addiction and depression. I had shared God’s love and pointed them to hope in him, but I was getting a bit discouraged as I watched some who were fading away yet again.
Listening to each story, I saw not only the band members’ faces, but the faces of the people I was burdened for. To hear them share how God had totally transformed their lives when they had been so lost, my hope inside that was dwindling grew stronger again. If God could heal that divorced woman, free that heroin addict and break the chains for that man caught in pornography, there was still hope for the ones I know who seemed to be drifting once more. “Keep listening, keep loving, keep praying, keep the hope,” a quiet voice inside encouraged.
The most meaningful part of the evening was when “I Am They” said that they had arrived early to pray over each of the chairs. When they told us that, I pretty much lost it. When someone takes the time to pray over the chairs, it is because their heart longs for the person who will sit there to be touched by God in the way they need his touch. I remembered the times that I had been the one to pray over the chairs, but this time, someone had actually prayed over the chairs for me! I hoped that no one could see as I wiped my tears.
I love to listen, to pray, to speak words of truth, to love and to minister by helping people find hope in Jesus. But I had walked into that building that night with a tired body, a worn out mind and a troubled soul. To hear that someone had prayed over my chair was like a hug from God. I needed that. To be ministered to by someone who didn’t even know me was a reminder to me that God is watching and listening, ready to reach down at just the right moment.
I love Casting Crowns, but I wouldn’t have been at that concert that night if my friend hadn’t offered me a ticket. I almost didn’t go, but I felt the need. I walked in worn down and walked out rejuvenated. God met me there in the crowd at a sold-out concert that I wasn’t sure I wanted to attend. It was a gift from my friend and a gift from my Daddy at just the right time. He always knows what I need.